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Archive for the ‘Women’ Category

I rarely just post my thoughts or observations on here but I am going to attempt to.  Here goes:

I realized to day that I am in an in between place in society.  That is to say I don’t have a group that quite fits.  I am in my late 40’s and most people my age are married with kids, living in a house that they own or rent. How can I relate to these people at a dinner table….(conversation), Oh we took out a second mortgage on the house today so we can start paying for Michael juniors college.  We are hoping he gets into UCLA.  ….hmmm, well what do I say to this?  I am going to community college let me talk to your son.  That is the other aspect of my life that is different.  I am surrounded by young students in their late teens and early twenties.  They are just starting out in their life, they grew up in the 90’s the years of grunge and teletubbies, and I grew up with The Jetsons and bell bottoms.  They like to play beer pong when they have a party, in my day we did shots (usually tequila) but those days are long gone.  I laugh when they tell me they are old and they just turned 21.  What the heck does that make me, old geiser.  I suppose in some of their eyes I am.  At times I feel that way too.  I have fun when around them, most of the time but can’t really relate to some of the antics and the laid back attitudes.  In my younger years we went dancing on Friday and often Saturday nights but they like to hang out, play beer pong or drink beers.

Here I am, not sure where to go or how to find a group of people that fit.  I don’t own a car so it isn’t always easy to go to things at night, it can be scary coming home at 12:30 in Los Angeles.  A lot of my friends have moved or are very busy with families of their own.  I find myself having less and less people to do stuff with on the weekends.

I suppose I need to join groups on meetup.com or something similar to that.  I have gone to a few events with them and they keep me busy but yet to connect with anyone.

In between, middle aged with a child like heart but an adult mind, both in spirit.

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The following article is taken from Forbes.com and also now on Yahoo.com

I read it and it didn’t give me much insight about why the sexes choose the cars that they do except that the men choose pick up trucks for the storage and ruggedness. I noticed the cars men choose are Porsche’s and Hummers, pretty cool cars and the women choose Saturn’s and Hyundai’s….boring. What about the other cars…Mercede’s, BMV, Audi’s, Toyota? Didn’t list any of these popular cars. I wonder if a survey was done or they just spoke with a few dealers regarding which cars are more bought. If I were rich I would go out and buy a sports car today just to show not only men are the ones who like them. I would rather see an article listing the 10 most bought cars, which sex bought them and why? (Interviews with each sex and what appeals to them about that car). I am certainly not running out to my Hyundai dealer because this article suggests that more women buy them. There also was no mention of Hybrid cars, SUV’s. I think this article is lacking in information. Let me know what you think?

Most Popular Cars For Men And Women
Want a ”manly” car? Opt for a pickup. Feeling like a more feminine set of wheels? Go visit your local Saturn, Honda or Volkswagen dealer.
By Peter Hoy
provided by:

Volkswagen Beetle
To buy the Chevy Silverado heavy-duty pickup, some might argue that in addition to the $22,225 sticker price, you also need a Y chromosome. That’s because 93% of the truck’s buyers are men. In fact, males own about nine out of 10 heavy-duty pickup trucks on the road, according to findings by AutoPacific, a market research firm focused on the auto industry.

Womens’ tastes run a little more refined. AutoPacific found that female buyers most often choose models by Saturn, Honda and Volkswagen.

What gives? Though car companies typically avoid making gender-specific vehicles, says Jim Hossick, vice president and senior consultant at AutoPacific, “some cars are more masculine or feminine by nature.”

The market’s male-friendly cars include the Ford F-350 and the Dodge Ram, of which men own 93% and 89%, respectively. Chrysler spokesperson Dan Bodene says it is a combination of marketing and design that has created such disproportionate numbers.

The “Built Ford Tough” tag line, for example, can be heard during commercial breaks in NFL games, and other ads for the beefy F-Series feature burly men in cowboy hats.

“It depends on the model, but the Ram tends to be used by guys who need the capability, either as heads of households hauling a lot of stuff, or on job sites in male-dominated professions,” says Bodene. Consequently, door handles need to be large enough for a man’s gloved hand, and seats need to be able to move far enough away from the steering wheel to accommodate larger bodies–the average American man is five and half inches taller and 27 pounds heavier than the average woman.

But it’s an equal-opportunity marketplace, and carmakers try to design vehicles–even heavy-duty pickups–that won’t discourage any potential buyers. Tailgates must be light enough for all types of people to lift, and seatbelts must be comfortable for male and female body types.
Women-Friendly Wheels
While AutoPacific’s data shows brands such as Hummer, Dodge, Porsche and GMC are most popular among men, models produced by Saturn, Honda, Volkswagen and Hyundai are the biggest hits with female drivers.

An estimated 65% of Volkswagen Beetle Convertible buyers are female. The New Beetle, with a 5-cylinder engine, is nearing a decade of production; the soft-top model came on the market in 2003.

VW spokesperson Keith Price acknowledges the New Beetle is purchased and driven more by females, but says it was not a result of designers trying to make a women’s car.

“It happened more organically,” says Price, explaining that the car was initially launched to have dual appeal. After the New Beetle had been out for a few years, and sales data started piling up, VW marketers then found ways to benefit from its popularity among women–stylish designs cues and more feminine colors such as “gecko green” and “sunflower yellow.”

“The female appeal of the car is one of the things that has sustained it over the years without a great deal of aesthetic change,” says Price, “but VW does absolutely not consider it ‘a woman’s car.'”
All Show and No Go
In fact, the notion of a “female” automobile has become long outdated.

“People who have tried to make a vehicle that is female-centric have failed,” says Hossick. “Women might buy a ‘man’s’ vehicle, but men won’t buy a ‘women’s’ car.”

The most famous attempt was the Dodge LaFemme, dreamt up by marketers trying to capitalize on the growing interest in automobile ownership among women in the early 1950s. The car sported pink upholstery patterned with rosebuds and came with a matching purse, raincoat and umbrella. It was outfitted with lipstick holders and painted a new shade, dubbed Heather Rose.

Hyundai Tucson

Dodge gave it a 218-Hp V8 engine–a lot more muscle than today’s top sellers among women, like the 140-Hp Hyundai Tucson–but the LaFemme only made it through two years of production, with sales estimated around 2,500.

“Women were generally offended by it, and men wouldn’t touch it with a stick,” says Hossick. “If you can’t sell a car to boys and you can’t sell it to girls, then the market is going to be pretty small.”

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Should celebrities be skinny all the time? If a woman is size 12 does that make her fat? What about a size 5 or 8? The average woman in America is size 12 to 14 but the media wants us to strive to be a size 4. Would this be healthy for some? Here is one woman who I knew from the start I liked, used to be just for her voice but now her personality make me like her even more. See for yourself and let me know what you think?

Kelly Clarkson:

I’m Tired of Hearing

“the Fat Joke”

Us Magazine – June 5, 2009 6:07 AM PDT

Story photo: Kelly Clarkson: I'm Tired of Hearing Kelly Clarkson attends Z100’s Zootopia 2009 presented by IZOD FRAGRANCE at Izod Center on May 16, 2009 in East Rutherford, New Jersey.
Jamie McCarthy/WireImage for Clear Channel Radio
Us Magazine

Kelly Clarkson says she’s tired of being bullied over her weight.

“For seven years it’s been happening. It’s like, ‘OK cool, the fat joke,'” she said during an interview with 2Day FM’s Kyle and Jackie O Show in Australia.

Despite the taunts, the American Idol champ says, “I love my body. I’m very much OK with it. I don’t think artists are ever the ones who have the problem with their weight, it is other people.”

Clarkson has also come under scrutiny over her sexuality. She says she doesn’t care if people think she is gay.

Her only gripe?

“The rumors are not helping me on the dating front!” she said. “I prefer the boys. I’m extremely flattered when I do get hit on by girls, and I think it’s hot, but I’m not into it. I like boys.”

She said she’s in no rush to find Mr. Right.

“I’m only 27, not 40 and still single!” she said. “I enjoy being single, I love work and I think people are so passive with relationships and I’m not that person.”

Added Clarkson, “I’m an extremist, I’m either in a relationship or I’m not. I’m honest about it and I’ll tell people, it’s just there’s nothing to tell. I have a very good life.”

http://omg.yahoo.com/news/kelly-clarkson-i-m-tired-of-hearing-the-fat-joke/23417?nc

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So if you have checked out my blog or you know me, you can tell I am an Alanis admirer (fan doesn’t seem like the right word). I recently got this amazing opportunity to see her perform and answer questions for the Nissan Live Sets, which is show put on by Nissan and Yahoo of various musical artists. I had a wonderful time and wanted to share it with you. Just released today, here is her singing You Learn. Note: somewhere in this video I am singing along also. 🙂

http://new.music.yahoo.com/livesets/Alanis-Morissette–36678026&vid=59774696

Also coming out on June 10th is her next album, Flavors of Entaglement. To find out more about this amazing and powerful woman, check out her web blog at:  http://www.alanis.com

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I watch the repeats of Sex and the City and find myself thinking that Carrie is my least favorite character, most of the time. She dates big, over and over again, even though she gets her heart broken each time. Where was writer Greg Berendht’s input in this (consultant and writer on the show and wrote the book, he is just not that into you).

She opens herself up to Big, she is the epitimy of what drives me nuts about media’s portrayal of women. We are either pushy bitches who will stomp on anyone to get anything we want or we are powerless over love, repeating the same mistakes over and over again. Of course the reasoning is always, We Can’t Choose Who We Love or I can’t help. The I love him so what ever am I to do, I can’t help myself. I believe it may be difficult to not have feelings for someone but we have a choice as to whether we take action on those feelings. We are a reactionary society however that feeds of thinking we have to have it, and we are taught to go with our first reaction, instead of being taught to stop and think about what we are doing, what the consequences of our actions will be or remembering perhaps a lesson learned in the last time we went through this and realizing, hey I am not going down that path again.

Every time I see the episode where Carrie tells Aidan that she slept with BIG, I get upset. She tells him right before they are to go to Charlotte’s wedding.She is looking at him with sad eyes, as if to say, okay come with me to this wedding, after she just dropped this huge bomb on him. He leaves and I get the feeling we are to feel bad for her but all I can think of is, why did you cheat on such a great man, I would love to have a man who was like Aidan. Then when they get back together and he has a difficult time dealing with trusting her, she comes to him and pleads, “You have to forgive me, You Have to” To keep a relationship going where someone has cheated, it is very difficult for the person who got cheated on to trust. Sometimes it takes years, and from most of the people I know, the relationship usually ends because it is so difficult to trust the person. Well this is television however, the place where most people are supposed to just get over things in an instant. A great example of this is when a person dies, and the widow is single six months later and her friends are saying, you need to get out and date. Our society is afraid to be alone, afraid to be with who we are. The thinking is always, you will be happy if you have someone. When someone gets married, what do most people say, Oh now they can be happy or happily ever after? No wonder there are so many dysfunctional people out there, and believe me I am guilty of being one. I haven’t always made the greatest choices but I realize they were mine and I do all I can to learn from them.

This fairytale all starts when we are young girls…fairytales where there is a maiden or young girl, trapped by some evil witch and the only way we can get out is to be rescued from a tower or to break the coma she is in to be kissed by a dashing prince. How unrealistic is this in the real world? We see on Television shows and movies that a girl who doesn’t get asked to the dance is a loser or pathetic. To quote one show where a girl didn’t get asked to the big dance ” I will probably end up an old maid”. Where is the teaching to our children that hey, don’t wait, you don’t get invited to a dance, then go with friends, or gather a group of people who didn’t get invited and go as a group or even better go by yourself. Yes it is hard to be independent. I have struggled with this my whole life and still do but when I do go out to a coffee house, a movie by myself it is getting easier. I am lucky to have been surrounded at times by strong women. I had a good friend who used to tell me when we would go dancing, you want to dance, then get out there. Men were so shocked at times to see me out there dancing by myself, and not sitting demurely waiting for someone else to have fun. One time while at a club I had a guy yell outloud in front of a bunch of people (trying to embarass me), “what you couldn’t find someone to dance with you” to which I replied, I don’t have to have someone to ask me to dance, I am not trapped in the 50’s, I can dance with myself and that is just fine. The crowd around me clapped for me. I felt good.

I am not saying we don’t need love nor am I saying not to want another to share your life. I am talking about loving life even if you don’t have that person, or as Inyala says, In the Meantime. To dance with yourself and your heart is a devine and powerful thing, filled with mysterious wonder and magic.

Even after bra burning, and woman’s rights, there is still an imbalance. There still are so many people out there teaching young girls that her happiness will come when she meets Mr. Right. That if we are to loud or speak our mind, we are bitches or obnoxius. Did anyone call Kurt Cobain obnoxious, okay probably some did but the masses of critics called him a genius, I don’t disgree but what about Alanis when Jagged Little Pill came out…she was labeled an angry woman. She still is by some people though her music reflects a whole new person who has emerged and I have seen anger is just an emotion she expresses, just like Kurt did.

The messages for both sexes are not easy. Men being taught not to show emotion and woman being portrayed as only emotional or if they have to much emotion, they are crazy. Men being taught to be fighters, to be bread winners, and to be rescuers. Women being taught that if they aren’t pretty enough or sweet enough no man will want them. The pressure for both sexes is crazy. I say teach the children to love themselves and those around them. To appreciate the talents and skills that they have. That happiness is something that is created not something you wait to have happen. I say this for them but also for myself.

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spears_album.jpg

Dear Britney,

Though the chances of you actually geting this is one in a million, I am writing it anyway.

I have been thinking of you lately, hard not to with you being in the news everyday. I haven’t been a huge fan of yours, I don’t own any of your cd’s, I do like a few of your songs though, Slave to You, Toxic and your newest Hit Gimme More. The cuteness, sexy thing bugged me, oops I did it again, that twirl the hair, I am so sweet and innocent thing but trying to be sexy…blah. Then evolved a bit with Not a girl but not quite a woman, speaking the truth about that awkward age in life when you are not a teenager anymore but not a full grown woman yet either.

I have watched you go from cutesy, sexy vixen, confused person. I thought back and rememberd my twenties…oh my no picnic there, confusing, sexual exploration, transformation, sometimes a bit too cutesy and wrapped up in a blanket of constant not knowing. I started to think wow, what would that be like and then add having huge fame, and being folowed every where you go, you gain 5 lbs and it is on the news, you cry in public it is in a tabloid, you where an outfit that is a wild choice and you are bashed nationally. Now this is part of the choice you made when wanting to be famous, but very stressful to deal with. I would have been a nervous wreck if every little thing I did was scrutinized.

Good for you taking chances, changing hair color, style, diving into discovery. I admire your shaving your head, for being sexy, for searching spirituality.

I want to tell you it is okay that you are not perfect, it is okay that you are going through discovery, I hope though that you take all you have gone through and choose to learn from it, You are so much stronger than you probably think you are. Your children love you, but love yourself first so you can be there for them, they need you. Don’t by in the media pressure or let them get to you. You are talented in many ways and turn to those who have come before you, those you admire like Madonna, who have been through this. For a while I saw you approaching spirituality and it seemed to focus you, I hope you go back to that. These days are not easy, hang in there. It does get easier though life is always this journey of growth, clarity comes when open to it. Allow yourself space to not be the center of attention but to look at the center of who you are and there you will find where you need to be going.

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Dare

So many messages we are given, but do we listen to the most important one…that small little voice within our head. These are my thoughts about it put in poetry form.

Dare

    Girl goes to a dance alone,
    She is thought of as a loser,
    Women sings lyrics about her anger
    Of a cheating lover,
    She is labeled a bitch.
    Woman over 40,
    Posts an ad ,
    For true love only,
    Told no man will want her,
    Her eggs are all dried up.
    Tales told,
    are old,
    Time to let them go.
    Woman,
    Hear the words of those,
    Who have been there.
    It is okay to yell,
    It is okay to dare,
    to love,
    Yourself,
    To love another,
    Dream of a being a mother.
    Stand on a dance floor,
    Shake your groove,
    Make a move,
    To Dare to be bold.
    This story is yours,
    Make it the one,
    You want to be told.
    Let go ,
    Of the book,
    That they have given,
    The media,
    The Voices,
    The Ones who make the choices,
    To bring you down,
    To the level they live in.
    It is your time to believe in,
    Stories they never told.

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